No... this isn't about me and cancer...
I'm going to rant...
Now, before I get truly started, I want everyone out there to know I don't take cancer lightly. I've lost bits and pieces of several family members to it, some naughty bits of my own to prevent it, and the lives of some incredible friends. I hate it. I've just finished that wonderful book, "Life's That Way" by Jim Beaver, and I hate it more than ever.. .
That being said, I have a rant to rant...
There are other things that are debilitating. There are other things that interrupt your life and the quality of it, although not nearly as devastating as cancer.
and yet..
all some specialist seems to want to be able to tell you is "It's Not Cancer".
While I understand that this makes them feel good in a way they sometimes don't get to feel, what I would ALSO like is to have them make some effort to know what it IS.
Medicine seems to be a practice (and there's a reason for that word) of eliminating what something ISN'T, and not always figuring out what is...
Example:
About 8 months ago part of my right breast turned bright pink. Bright dark pink... and itched.
I searched for the inevitable spider bite or kitty scratch or something, but couldn't find it. I lotioned it and tried not to scratch and it acted like a sunburn and finally peeled. I basically ignored it.
Then, about a month later, it did it again. So I went to my wise gynecologist and she recommended finding a dermatologist. I did, and she said she wished I'd gotten there when it was still bright pink. I told her I tried, even coming into the office at the time. I took pictures. I gave it names. She said "let's take a biopsy", (of WHAT?) in spite of the fact that I have no breast tissue left.
I didn't care. You can cut any part of me you wish. I've got plenty more.
So, I come back and she says ... wait for it... no... it's coming... "It's Not Cancer".
I never thought for one minute that it was. I suspect that she pronounced that because she DIDN'T KNOW WHAT IT WAS, although she came to a pretty wrong conclusion just the same.. She thought that I would ignore what she didn't know in my relief that it wasn't (shhhhh) cancer.
Oh.. and an aside?? Doctors out there?? IT'S OK TO SAY YOU DON'T KNOW.. rather than just make something up. Turning aside my question with a joke or a laugh or a pat or a 'make something up' is patronizing. and rude. At this point I'm pretty enlightened about my body, and I rarely ask questions I don't want answered.
Same with the colonoscopy I had after a gastrointestinal meltdown the size of Chicago. It's Not Cancer. I knew that. I've been having these episodes since forever. So I said to the girl who called me (NOT the doctor, of course, after all it's not cancer) so when do I see the doctor. Why? She asked. I said... I had this problem. IT'S NOT CANCER, so what should I do, do you think? I saw the doctor. She was perplexed by the visit. After all, IT'S NOT CANCER. I said, what should I do? Surgery? She said she could give me the name of a doctor if I wanted. I thought she was one...
and the detached vitreous(es) which, while I was told I would 'get used to them' have not. They are of no consequence as they are 'not cancer ( or dangerous or WHATEVER).
and... well...
Do you get where I'm going here? I'm writing an "Ode to the Uncaring (substitute unknowing, uninvolved, unenlightened here)
Doctor". It's going to rival Homer's Odyssey...
And while I cannot imagine how it would feel to get that diagnosis, I do wish that "they" would consider what else it might be if it's not cancer.
so..
I'm thinking about not seeing doctors anymore...
Maybe THAT will make everything feel better..
you think?
